“Surely”, I want to say, “if I'm ˇto be really quite frank I must say that I have something which nobody has”. – But who's I? – Hell! I don't express myself properly but there's something you can't deny that there is my personal experience & that this in a most important sense has no neighbour. – But you don't mean by that that it happens to be alone but that it's grammatical position is that of having no neighbour.
     “But somehow our language doesn't B bring it out, that there is something unique namely real present experience, & do you just wish to advise me to resign myself to that?”